Wednesday, October 31, 2007

CursedCleveland.com's Annual Halloween Post!


First of all...here's a completely fictitious aol instant messenger conversation that eventually led to the our special Halloween relaunch of CursedCleveland.com.



IloveBraylon69: So what's your costume going to
be?


2girls1cuplover: I was thinking either a
registered sex offender or LeBron's free throw shooting coach.

IloveBraylon69: LeBron has a free throw shooting
coach?

2girls1cuplover: Yeah that's true...I guess I'd have a better chance dressing up as LeBron's father.

Screw that.. registered sex offender it is.

IloveBraylong69: So you're obviously going as yourself

2girls1cuplover: You got it.

IloveBraylong69: Hey, remember that unsuccessful site that we ran that not
only wasted our time, but also our reader's?

2girls1cuplover: PregnantSororityVirgins.com?

IloveBraylon69: The other one

2girls1cuplover: CursedCleveland.com?

IloveBraylon69: Yep..let's relaunch

2girls1cuplover: Sure.


So there you have it. Much has happened during our four-month hiatus. For one...many more terrible Cleveland sports blogs have started. I figured someone out there would at least stumble onto a creative and compelling format. Never once happened. Why would I want to read someone else's unfunny hack writing, when I have my own to fall back on? So here's just a taste of the events that we may have missed, with an exhaustive bank of opinions and analysis to follow. Readers are encouraged to write in with more if they'd like more reaction.


LeBron plays well in the olympics: Technically everyone played well (except for Billups). Also, can idiot fans stop calling Rizzo's show with "Look how great LeBron played with a point guard! See.! That proves how good the Cavs could be with a point guard!" Oh really? Did we really need Team USA to prove this? We're just now finding out that all-star point guards are valuable? Also, EVERYONE played well on Team USA. So I'm not exactly sure why Cavs fan hang onto this egocentric view that only LeBron plays better with a point guard. Also - how about the fact that Kobe Bryant was on this team as well? Did that help anyones cause?


Indians go on amazing post-season run: Well, if we're prepared to call winning a 5 game series against a team of the brink of disbanding and then choking away three straight games in humiliating fashion, then I guess a "run" it is. Obviously it was exciting and they should be happy they got as far as they did - but let's be honest, unless the Dolans demonstrate a willingness to bring in free agents, then there's no guarantee this team every makes the playoffs again. See the ultimate misnomer in baseball is that spending money doesn't guarantee you anything. Not true. It guarantees you that the percentages are on your side for making the playoffs. And as we know, advancing in the MLB playoffs is about as skill-driven rock scissors paper.
Browns are potentially playoff bound: The one and only disappointing aspect of this year is that the Browns let this guy get away. The fact is, the Browns have a legitimately explosive offense. The defense: About as good as you would expect with a team granting serious playing time to Simon Frasier. Has anyone purchased TradeBradyQuinn.com?

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

He's baaaaaccccccck!!!

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