Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Indians Front Office to Rely on Message Boards in 08



CLEVELAND - The Cleveland Indians, considered around Major League Baseball as a budget-minded organization that champions value, has decided to shift personnel evaluation from their scouts - to free, easily accessible internet message boards.

The reigning American Central League Champions came within one game of advancing to the World Series in 07, only to be defeated by Boston Red Sox in three straight games. Many analysts believe the Indians playoff success will be short-lived because of their modest payroll.

“We recognized that as an organization, we have to constantly seek new answers and to think outside the box in order to improve this team,” said Indians GM Mark Shapiro. “Who better to turn to than our most fervent sect of followers, who wear their emoticons - I mean, emotions on their sleeves and refuse to settle for anything less than 1000 baseball. Nuff said.”

Shapiro will peruse five Indians message boards on a daily basis, each one systematically saved to his favorites in alphabetical order. He says he’ll put more of an emphasis on threads that are either “stickied” (a designation for topics that are permanently stationed towards the top of the board), or those that feature an animated fiery ball that denotes a highly responded to post.

Shapiro’s critics will almost assuredly point to the fickle nature of message boards, and that often times, emotions arouse to a point of irrationality after losses. Despite those concerns, the 2005, 07 Executive of the Year is determined to register and log on like everyone else.

“I’m not going to sit here and act like we’ll be hiring and firing coaches daily based solely on typical message board overreaction,” Shapiro said. “But if there’s a clarion call that demands a new direction, we’ll be emboldened by our fan base to make the necessary changes. If the sentiment is universal that a guy needs to be gone or that our manager got outmanaged, we won't hesitate to make the necessary moves."

The Indians first move under the new organizational setup was to re-implement the use of Chief Wahoo on all their uniforms – something Shapiro said was an easy decision; while viewing a recently "bumped" thread.

“IIRC, the majority of emoticons our fans use to illustrate their discontent, bears a strong resemblance to the offensive red-faced logo emblazoned on our uniforms since the 1940’s,” Shaprio said. “And if anyone has a problem with it, then pffffft to them - fwiw”

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

It doesn't seem clear if chat rooms will be me another tool for development.

Funny stuff guys, does this mean you're back?

Anonymous said...

What about facebook groups? Will "Poking" be involved?

Anonymous said...

TTT

Anonymous said...

lol, lmao, roflmao, gg, ttyl.

Anonymous said...

Eharmony is great at matching mediocre looking people. Maybe Dr. Clark could help the indians find more mediocre players using his 38 levels of compatibility

Anonymous said...

I really hope you guys stick around this time.

cc sabathia said...

maybe this will allow the indians to cut costs on scouting staffs and resign me.

speaking of my contract, I do demand a lifetime supply of toll house cookiewiches to be supplied at my house.

Anonymous said...

have you guys used your recent surge in revenue to hire a graphic artist?

That photoshop work on that picture of shapiro is stellar.

Anonymous said...

runescape money runescape gold tibia item tibia gold runescape accounts tibia money runescape gp buy runescape gold tibia gold tibia item buy runescape money runescape items tibia money

Anonymous said...

情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣用品,情趣,情趣,情趣,情趣,情人歡愉用品,情趣用品,AIO交友愛情館,情人歡愉用品,美女視訊,情色交友,視訊交友,辣妹視訊,美女交友,嘟嘟成人網,按摩棒,震動按摩棒,微調按摩棒,情趣按摩棒,逼真按摩棒,G點,跳蛋,跳蛋,跳蛋,性感內衣,飛機杯,充氣娃娃,情趣娃娃,角色扮演,性感睡衣,SM,潤滑液,威而柔,香水,精油,芳香精油,自慰,自慰套,性感吊帶襪,情趣用品加盟,情人節禮物,情人節,吊帶襪,成人網站,AIO交友愛情館,情色,情色貼圖,情色文學,情色交友,色情聊天室,色情小說,七夕情人節,色情,A片,A片下載,免費A片,免費A片下載,情色電影,色情網站,辣妹視訊,視訊聊天室,情色視訊,免費視訊聊天,視訊聊天,美女視訊,視訊美女,美女交友,美女,情色交友,成人交友,自拍,本土自拍,情人視訊網,視訊交友90739,生日禮物,情色論壇,正妹牆,正妹,成人網站,A片,免費A片,A片下載,免費A片下載,AV女優,成人影片,色情A片,成人論壇,情趣,免費成人影片,成人電影,成人影城,愛情公寓,色情影片,保險套,舊情人,微風成人,成人,成人遊戲,成人光碟,色情遊戲,跳蛋,按摩棒,一夜情,男同志聊天室,肛交,口交,性交,援交,免費視訊交友,視訊交友,一葉情貼圖片區,性愛,視訊,嘟嘟成人網

愛情公寓,情色,舊情人,情色貼圖,情色文學,情色交友,色情聊天室,色情小說,一葉情貼圖片區,情色小說,色情,色情遊戲,情色視訊,情色電影,aio交友愛情館,色情a片,一夜情,辣妹視訊,視訊聊天室,免費視訊聊天,免費視訊,視訊,視訊美女,美女視訊,視訊交友,視訊聊天,免費視訊聊天室,情人視訊網,影音視訊聊天室,視訊交友90739,成人影片,成人交友,美女交友,微風成人,嘟嘟成人網,成人貼圖,成人電影,A片

Post a Comment