Michael Vick Loves Dogs

It looks as if "Ron Mexico" may not be suiting up for the first day of minicamp, as he will be arraigned by a federal court on the very same day that he's supposed to uncomfortably put his pads on over his herpes outbreaks and get ready for another mediocre, injury-plagued season. Usually, I'm all for athletes getting in trouble off the field, in fact it's well documented that I actually support players who do awful shit in their personal lives and then perform well on the field, court or whatever the surface may be (Kobe Bryant, T.O., Barry Bonds...I could be here all night listing the crop of awful people I support). That being said, this is a situation that even I can't comprehend. I mean there are reports of this guy actually hanging puppies, electrocuting dogs who wouldn't fight, and it's even being speculated that Mr. Vick may have even eaten a live human being. At least he will have lots of street cred when he gets into prison, since to these "Thugs" having a pittbull is some sort of symbol of power. On a related note, we have a small white and brown cat named Frank at our house, does that give us any Street Cred? Come on, not even a little? What if we brought in a big bad Siamese cat and made them fight to the death? What the hell is wrong with this guy?

I doubt this guy will ever play professional football again, and I can't even imagine how miserable it will be trying to watch SportsCenter for the next few months with this garbage as the headline every day. All kidding aside though, the most important part of this equation clearly revolves around Madden '08. We have to assume that he's already in the game, due to the fact that it will be released in less than a month. However, if they pull him out of the game, every bad Madden player on earth who relies on rolling out of the pocket with Vick and running every down will be shit outta luck. Check back for further updates, as we at CursedCleveland.com will do everything in our power to not post anything for the next month or so. Continue Entry»

My Wish

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Draft Dodging

OK, so Thursday night the Cavaliers organization was about as active as Chris Benoit's upcoming 4th of July family picnic, but it this necessarily a bad thing? People in the collective Cavs nation are seemingly outraged about their lack of a draft deal. But of course, half of the "Cavs nation" just started watching basketball four years ago (and that includes Kenny Roda, and myself, and Mike Brown).

This morning in Brian Windhorst's critically acclaimed blog, he reports that Chris Sheridan wrote that a Larry Hughes deal might be on the horizon.

he heard the Cavs were shopping Larry Hughes. This is true and this has been true since the trading deadline when Danny Ferry openly told the media that he had conversations about every player on his roster with the exception of LeBron James....he’s just not a good fit with LeBron at this point. They do not complement each other and most times they do not have a great chemistry on the court.

Hmm..they don't complement each other? I thought LeBron supposedly has this all-encompassing, omniscient ability to make the game easier for everyone. Sure seems that Gilbert Arenas was able to mesh fairly well with Larry Hughes...

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In Bill Livingston's profoundly confusing piece this morning about past finals sweeps, he lets it be known that the Cavs/Spurs cannot possibly be considered the most lopsided sweep of all time. Well, it came in second place. But remember, second place only counts in horseshoes, hand grenades and the Special Olympics.

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Also, count CursedCleveland.com as one of the leading nattering nabobs of negativity when it comes to LeBron's decision to play in next month's FIBA America's tournament. Not necessarily because we care about his durability, but mostly because we care about Team USA's fortunes. Other than marketing considerations, we still don't understand why he was invited to play on Team USA. You would think we'd have this down by now. Guys who don't have a midrange game and can't shoot consistently from the outside are a liability, not a plus in international league play.

Sure the rules are gimmicky and senseless (International officials stole many ideas from this game show), but it doesn't change the fact that LeBron dribbled way too much and took way, wayyyy too many perimeter jumpers last year - and what exactly have we seen in 2007 to make us think he's learned his lessons? Not to mention he still can't shoot free throws or commit himself on the defensive end, or complete a sentence without continued double negative use. Continue Entry»

Trade LeBron for Kobe

Before I get to the central premise of this post, I have two simple questions I'd like our four remaining readers to answer objectively:

1) How certain are you that someone who wants to be the richest man in the world and who wants to optimize his exposure on an international level will actually sign an extension to stay in Cleveland, Ohio?

2) In all honestly, who would you rather have in an NBA finals to help win you a title RIGHT NOW against a team that will flat-out not allow you to get to the basket? A 22 year-old specimen who lacks a mid-range game who would continue to "get guys involved" even if he was playing in a coed wheelchair basketball league, or a seasoned vet with rings and an ability to score 35 points a game on jump shots alone who refuses to let a weak supporting cast cost him games when they're not hitting?

My answers:
1: Not very
2: Kobe Bryant

We learned something very important during the playoff run: The Cavalier supporting cast is much better than they've been getting credit for. Think about it. LeBron's shooting percentage during the entire post-season was an unimpressive 41% - and that includes his fluky 48-point game 5 performance against the Pistons. (And by the way, LeBron was one of the worst three-point shooters in the NBA this season. Once the playoffs started, it got historically bad - he shot 28%. This aspect of his game just should just NOT be part of his arsenal. Keep in mind, that teams are giving him this shot b/c they are rightly terrified about his ability to get to the hole). Yet despite his poor shooting and equally bad decision making, the Cavaliers continued to win.

Now back to the alleged "bad" supporting cast. The same supporting cast that had a second round draft pick step up and outplay LeBron in San Antonio. How many rookies in the league have EVER done that in the NBA finals on the road?

How about an undersized power forward who shot over 50% and nabbed 6 rebounds a game while playing only half the minutes, while also shutting down Detroit's power forwards late in the series both mentally and physically? AV's pretty good, and when paired up with Drew Gooden, the Cavaliers get a very solid 48 minutes of power forward play a night.

While Larry Hughes' injuries clearly caught up to him, he outplayed LeBron in the Wizards series (each game was much closer than they should have been, and Hughes was the guy hitting shots down the stretch).

And don't forget about Z and how he single-handedly dismantled the Wiz and had his moments in the Detroit series while giving them fits on the boards.

So this team obviously has some talent and is closer to a championship than so many of us thought they were. LeBron is a huge part of this - if not the biggest (although I could write 5000 words on why Mike Brown was more important, but then you'll call me Skip Bayless and then I would threaten to fight you).

So given the fact that I'm not willing to risk losing LeBron b/c Cleveland isn't exactly a haven for "global icons," - LeBron's poorly chosen words, not mine, and given the fact that Kobe is still the best player in the game and the most annoying guy to defend in the league (other than the tuberculosis guy), I think the Cavs organization would be crazy not to pursue a LeBron James for Kobe Bryant trade, all salary cap restrictions considered. The Cavs could even throw in Gloria's yellow plates to make the deal work!

Think about it how unique this opportunity would be in the history of sports. When could you add the best player in the game to a team that just made it to the finals? I know the concept is sacrilege to Clevelanders, who are myopic enough to believe the city of Cleveland could actually be able to retain a young, talented employee. Continue Entry»

Cavs have a big game tonight.

Against Detroit. Some say there's some significance as well. Continue Entry»

Tony and Joe Return

Back despite no particular demand of any kind, it's the "Tony and Joe Show."

We're still the most interactive internet show on the planet that doesn't involve calls, guests or e-mails. There's tons of LeBron bashing, which our readers and listeners can't get enough of. Even more importantly, there's no lame Mike and Mike-like teases, such as "We'll tell you which team is down 2-0 to the Cavs, coming up next." We also break the news that Phil Savage and Jamarcus Russell have some sort of long relationship that dates back to Russell's prenatal existence in his mother's womb. Continue Entry»

CursedCleveland.com Meets Bad Internet Radio

OK so there are no phone calls, no guests, and nothing but contrived banter that's often scripted well in advance, but CursedCleveland.com is proud to embark on its newest endeavor (because the past endeavors have clearly been so successful): low budget, poorly produced internet radio. The fine people at Moohead Radio have assisted us in launching this sure-to-miss broadcast project. It's called the "Tony and Joe Show" and it can be heard on Mondays from 4:00 to 5:00 EST. Click HERE for the Tony and Joe Show

As for a return to traditional daily blogging, well, I wouldn't hold your breath. Continue Entry»