Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Manning Urges Moynahan to Abort Brady's Fetus

Rumors are swirling today that Peyton Manning has been privately lobbying to have Bridget Moynahan consider her abortion options. This may come as a shock to some of you, but who can really blame the guy? Just when Manning had finally conquered the metaphorical dragon, he is now staring down the barrel of a loaded gun with another Brady on his way into this world. To make matters worse for the Super Bowl MVP, divisional foe the Houston Texans appear so desperate to find a replacement for David Carr that they have offered Moynahan a contract of $55 million over 4 years for the rights to the fetus (Which would be a much better deal than taking Mario Williams over Reggie Bush). This could spell trouble for Manning, considering the Colts face the Texans twice a year.

Word out of Tom Brady's camp is that he supports Peyton, no matter what choice he makes. Brady has said, "I am very excited about this child, but it hurts me to see Peyton hurt in this way." Brady later said, "I am also one of the sexiest men alive, and clearly I don't want to have a child with a woman that is nearing forty that I kicked to the curb for a super model."

Here at CursedCleveland.com, we will intently follow this story to report any news on this matter to our loyal fans.
*The preceding has been a Guest Article from CursedCleveland.com's beat writer Mr. Elliott Feldman.
photo courtesy of masslive.com

7 comments:

Fan said...

This article is hilarious! Wish more websites had the sense of humor you guys do

Anonymous said...

I agree

Anonymous said...

Me too!

Elliott Feldman said...

I would like to thank my mom for commenting 3 times on my article

x-man said...

Your use of subtle sarcasm is outstanding! No one on the internet does that!

Jen d. said...

this kid may be the best writer and lover on the site!

Anonymous said...

mosquito bites!

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