Friday, February 6, 2009

The Celtics HATE Playing Good Teams


BOSTON - I know, I know, the Celtics just aren't the same team without Brian Scalabrine. That goes without saying. I haven't seen Eddie House's kid running around the sidelines lately either. But losing at home to the Lakers, the same team they dismantled in the Finals last year is simply inexcusable. They even managed to lose a nail biter where Kobe Bryant looked more like Coby Karl in overtime. Just a few observations that may make it difficult for this team of primadonnas to repeat:

1.Doc Rivers is, and always has been, a terrible coach. I love seeing him try to motivate his players during timeouts on ESPN, and watching them staring around the arena thinking to themselves "Is he done yet?" Please note: It has been said that a girl or two from my past has thought that very same thing while in bed with me...well actually "Is he done already?" Back to the Celtics...


2.Kevin Garnett talks more shit than any player in the NBA, and simply can't back it up. It's not intimidating to watch you pound your Ethiopian chest and talk to yourself, and it is also not intimidating in the least to watch you float around the key and shoot jumpers or oversell easy put back dunks. Christ, you're 7 feet tall, go to the basket.

3. Every year at the beginning of the year we hear that Paul Pierce has lost weight, and is in the best shape of his life. Unfortunately, his sloppy, unsculpted figure doesn't show it, and neither do his pudgy movements. I'll let him shoot step-back contested jumpers all day long, he couldn't possibly have another miraculous playoff run like he did last year. The stars don't align too often for fat people who flash gang signs (see Christopher Wallace).

4. Kendrick Perkins is bad, Leon Powe is worse, Glen Davis should be in the d-league.

5. It is easily agreeable that there are 3 "elite" teams in the NBA...the Celtics, the Cavaliers & the Lakers. The old men in green, unfortunately, are 1-3 this year against the other two teams. This is a team that thrives on confidence, and if they don't head into the playoffs with plenty of it, look for them to bow out early and the reign of the "Big 3" to come to an abrupt end.

9 comments:

NickP said...

Not surprisingly, Paul Pierce has shot better than Kobe 4 out of the past 5 years (including this year)...so if you don't want Pierce shooting, you definitely don't want Kobe gunning, right?

Right?

Anonymous said...

Those who watch stat lines only and don't actually watch sports leave comments like the ones above!

Webmaster said...

I would have liked to see Paul Pierce take a team with Smush Parker and Kwame Brown to the playoffs in the tougher conference..and almost upset the 60-win Suns.

I love Paul's game..but he's not Kobe, not even in the same discussion. He's a clutch player and has improved his defense over the last three years for sure.

NickP said...

Like when he dragged a dogshit Celtics team to the ECF in 2002?

Check out that roster, and don't say anything about Antoine Walker. He was the worst "supposedly good" player in the NBA in his day. Or at the very least...considerably worse than Lamar Odom.

Webmaster said...

Well Jason Kidd took the Nets to back to back NBA finals. So Kidd> PP and Kobe?

Sorry, doesn't work that way. You have to take into account the level of teams you're matched up against. The year the Lakers had Smush and Kwame, they would have gotten to the ECF or possibly further. That's how great Kobe was.

Paul Pierce is an excellent player, he's been a borderline all-star..tier 2 player for many years. But not in Kobe's league.

For the last 8 years it's been Tim Duncan/Kobe Bryant. The torch is being passed to LeBron as we speak.

Pierce isn't in the discussion. Probably because he led teams to win totals of 35, 36, 36, 33 and 24 (injury shortened). Kobe's worst year was 34, and that was injury shortened, with three of his starters missing 40% of the season or more).

Anonymous said...

Pierce would be shooting at a much lower percentage but every time he misses a shot, ... the refs bail him out with a foul call

I don't like the guy

Anonymous said...

Come on guys, Smush is the the top half of the D-league in scoring...

NickP said...

Kidd's been more productive than both Kobe and Pierce. That's not hard to fathom.

I think you really need to get off your hang up with Kobe leading his team to 4 losses against Phoenix.

The talent disparity is certainly not wide enough b/w West and East to where that should ever be considered better than leading a similarly awful roster to two playoff series (not game) wins.

el Kaiser said...

Yes! I wholeheartedly agree with the assessment that KG is the most un-intimidating player in the NBA. The chest pumps and the snarly snarls are laughable.

Get that weak stuff outta her.

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