Ming Squared

AP Photo

CHEVY CHASE, MARYLAND - Get a load of this guy! According to Sports Illustrated, Sun Ming Ming, the 7'9" center from China, signed today with the Maryland Nighthawks of the ABA. This Asian version of Gheorghe Muresan hopes to one day play in the NBA (And who isn't already wondering how long it will take for this guy to get posterized by Kobe or T-Mac). Sun is the tallest player in the history of professional basketball, and apparently complained that the XXXXXXL sized team sweatshirt that he was wearing was too small (Insert Asian penis size joke here). The owner of the Nighthawks raved about his "basketball IQ" and "soft hands," but said nothing about his acting skills (Ming made an appearance in Jackie Chan's upcoming movie Rush Hour 3). NBA scouts will be watching this guy closely, and so will Billy Crystal, I hear My Giant 2 is already being scripted.