Manning Up

SPECIAL GUEST ARTICLE BY CURSEDCLEVELAND CORRESPONDENT JFINE:

Attention to everyone who would like to get back the four hours of their lives which they wasted watching Super Bowl XLI: Quit feeling sorry for yourselves and embrace the horror that is now becoming one Chicago man’s reality. An unintelligent and uninformed die-hard Bears fan by the name of Scott Wiese is in the process of officially changing his name as a result of one of the most heinous bets in recent memory (not to worry Kingnick, this bet won’t hold a candle to half of your “lock of the day” picks). Due to a bet gone awry and the Bears memorable efforts on Super Bowl Sunday, Mr. Wiese was forced to change his alias to Peyton Manning. This story raises many questions; How stupid does someone have to be to actually follow through with this bet? Who would make such a wager based on a team quarterbacked by Rex Grossman? and finally, does this guy have any friends? The answers; Forrest Gump, Rain Man, and probably more than I do. A word to the wise folks, if you’re planning on making a similar bet in the future, make sure there is a better option for the name change. For instance, should the Cavaliers fall to the Pistons come playoff time, I will forever more be known as Rip Hamilton. My apologies for the last three minutes that you can never get back.

photo courtesy of mlv.com